Weird Food Mutant
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| Sandy, Utah | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| Fillmore, Utah | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| Paragonah, Utah | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| Mesquite, Nevada | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| Las Vegas, Nevada | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| Season Six Statistics | |||||||||||||||||||||
Distance
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Misc
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Transcript[edit | edit source]
Biltmore Estate
Dave Ballard: Hi! I’m Dave and I’m at North America’s largest single family home here in Asheville, North Carolina. You’re watching WhatImDoingRightNow.
("Intro" plays over the opening title screen.)
The Voiles' House – 11:03 AM MST
Michael Aranda: The Voiles have a treadmill desk and it’s the coolest thing. I can burn calories while working or while playing. That’s cool.
Potbelly
(Angels sing.)
Todd Williams: One Potbelly-five.
(Michael laughs.)
Michael: (In a low gravelly voice) It’s so good. Mmmm.
Katelyn Salem's Jeep – 12:26 PM MST
Michael: Okay, we just said goodbye to Josh and Mari. It’s time to drive from Salt Lake City to Las Vegas.
Driving South on I-15
(Dramatic, dark electronic music plays over shots of snow along the freeway.)
Michael: Did anybody look at the weather today? I don’t know how far south all this snow goes.
Nick Jenkins: (Over a walkie-talkie) What do you think about some Carl's Jr for some lunch?
Todd: (Over a walkie-talkie) I think you just said magic words.
Carl's Jr. – 2:34 PM MST
Michael: Toddly, this is like... your Potbelly.
(Todd happily offers a two handed high-five to Michael.)
(Michael laughs.)
Taxaco Gas Station
(Dramatic music continues while Michael washes the windows of the car.)
Driving South on I-15 & Lunt Roadside Park – 4:40 PM MST
(Music continues over shots of the snow and a timelapse of both a rest stop and driving out of the window of the car.)
Rebel Gas Station – 5:36 PM PST
Michael: We’ve made it to the Vir-gin River Cas-in-o. We're gassing up for what is probably the last time this evening. Todd and Nick went to go use the bathroom.
(Michael gets in the car.)
I’m just going to hang out in the car where it is nice and dry and warm. I need to look for an In-N-Out Burger.
Driving South on I-15
I think right now we are about an hour out of Las Vegas. Which is exciting for two reasons. The first being that that means we are done driving for the day. Second, there’s an In-N-Out in Las Vegas, and, boy howdy, do I like myself some In-N-Out Burger. Do you guys have people in your lives that are as much or more of a fan of fast food chain restaurants than I am? Because I know that I am and I wonder how... out of the ordinary that is. You guys in the comments often make me feel like a weird food mutant. That’s just the way I was raised you know?
(Dramatic music continues on a shot of Las Vegas in the distance.)
La Quinta Inn & Suites Parking Lot – 7:07 PM PST
Michael: (With exertion as Micahel gets out of the car) Oh boy. We made it to the La Quinta.
La Quinta Inn & Suites
Michael: Todd look at all these stockings.
Todd: What are the chances one is named Todd?
Michael: Uh.. hmm, I don’t see a Todd.
(Michael points the camera down the hallway outside his hotel room.)
Michael: (Out of breath) This hotel has no elevators, so we just have to cart all this stuff up by hand.
Katelyn Salem's Jeep
(Michael and Todd are in the parking lot walking toward the car; the camera is already on the dashboard.)
Todd: Uhh... Where’re we going?
Michael: Uhh... In-N-Out.
Todd: Ooo, t—to the big, uh... the big one?
Michael: Yeah.
Todd: The one that said “Hey, look at me”?
Michael: The one that’s (laughing) right down the street?
Todd: Yeah.
Michael: Todd are you ready to have a good conversation?
Todd: Ha haha, yeah man.
Michael: Good.
Todd: I always up for a good conversation.
Michael: Good.
Todd: I have ten dollars. A ten dollar bill in my—in my pocket.
Michael: Okay. What’s that for?
Todd: W—we’re in Las Vegas.
Michael: What are you going to do with your ten dollars?
Todd: I might go into a casino and, uh.. put it on something. Or I may just crumple it up and throw it into the gutter. Maybe the same thing.
Michael: The odds are that that is the same thing. But... it’s not as fun.
Todd: No. A—It’s—You get that little adrenaline spike. Normally we don’t stop here in Vegas. We just go on through. So, it would of been like another five hours.
Michael: I think the snow hampered our progress quite a bit. Usually, this should've just been a... four and a half hour drive or so.
In-N-Out Drive-thru
Todd: What are you going to get?
Michael: I’m gonna get a double double. Nick said that he wanted something with no spread. That’s to me, like, the thing that makes the burger, the spread.
Todd: Who calls it “spread”?
Michael: They do.
Todd: They call mayo “spread”?
Michael: No, they don’t have mayo. They have spread.
Todd: Ohh, okay. I—(laughing)—spread. You mean—
Michael: It’s their Thousand Island-ish sauce.
Todd: Oh. Yeah. Sure, it’s made with love in the back.
Michael: I was made with love in the back.
Todd: There—(chuckling)—That could be taken so many ways.
Todd: (Quietly) So many ways...
Michael: Do you have any idea how you were conceived?
Todd: I do know one thing: uh, my sister was in a crib.
Michael: You were conceived... whilst your sister were in a crib?
Todd: Yeah, because—b—b—because we’re—we’re 14 months apart, so she was, uh.. she was in a crib.
Michael: You’re just saying that she was...
Todd: I don’t know if she was in the room—
Michael: ...small. You don’t know...
Todd: No, no, no.
Michael: ...if she was physically in an actual crib.
Todd: No, I—No, I mean, she could've been.
Michael: My parents’ honeymoon—
Todd: You know this?
Michael: —was in Las Vegas.
Todd: Was that when you, uh... lil-little Mikey swam his way...?
Michael: No, I... So... my parents met at a church retreat and then they dated for a year or so, and then they decided, “You know, it’s been fun, but this isn’t working out. We should go our separate ways.” So they broke up. And a week after they broke up my mom found out she was pregnant. I’m 30, almost 31 years old and when my dad was my age, I was 5. If I was my dad, I would have a 5 year old son right now.
Todd: I do think about that as, uh... having a kid right now like how that would change my life. 'Cause right now I—I’m free as a bird to skip around, do what I want. Uhh.. then with a kid though, you kinda have—that changes things. Right now my he—my headspace is here and that would be over there.
(The car pulls up to the drive-thru speaker.)
Michael: What do you want?
Todd: I’m just going to get a double double as well, but with pickles.
In-N-Out Employee: Hi, how are you?
Michael: Good, how are you? May I please get a double double, but can I get pickles added to that?
Employee: (Confused) A—alright.
(Michael and Todd softly chuckling.)
Michael: And then I’d like to get another double double, also with no onions, but with no pickles. And then I would like to get another double double, that has no spread.
Employee: Alright, would you like onion as well?
Michael: (To Todd) Does Nick like onions?
Todd: I don’t know.
Michael: (To the In-N-Out employee) Uh, no thanks.
Todd: Yeah play it safe.
Employee: No onion?
Michael: Uh, okay I think that’s it!
(The car has pulled up to the first window.)
Michael: Uh, mustard and ketchup instead of the spread?
Employee: Yes.
Michael: Okay.
(Softly to Todd) Todd.
Todd: Mmm?
Michael: She has a name I don’t know how to pronounce.
Employee: Here’s your card and have a good night.
Michael: Thank you, you too.
Todd: Thank you.
What did it start with?
Michael: X.
Todd: Maybe the “x” is silent.
(Michael looks at the receipt.)
Michael: Is her name on this thing? Nnnnn—yeah. “X - o - c - h - i - t - l.” I’ve never seen that name before.
Todd: And sh—(chuckling)—she’s the sixth.
(Todd laughs.)
Michael: Maybe her last name is “Vi.”
Oooh, I need to find out what time—I forgot things are actually happening when we get to California. Nicole is flying into California tomorrow.
Todd: So is Katelyn.
Michael: Right, but Nicole’s flying in way earlier, so Stefan’s family is planning to leave Anaheim, drive to LAX, pick up Nicole, go to dinner, go back home, before I have to leave for LAX to pick up Katelyn.
Todd: Oh.
Michael: So, I need to find out what time they’re leaving Anaheim... earlier in the day.
Oh, I have a text from Nick.
Todd: Oh, he wants a diet drink.
(The car has pulled up to the second window.)
Michael: Uh, no thanks. Is it possible for us to add a drink to the order here?
Second In-N-Out Employee: Another drink? What kind of drink would you like? I’ll just get it for you.
Michael: Uh, a diet.
Employee: A diet? What size?
Todd: Uh, uh... medium.
Employee: Medium? Alright.
Todd: Thanks man.
Michael: That was very nice of him.
Todd: It is. I’ll give him five stars. What’s the rating system for, uh, Yelp? Is it five st—out of five? I don’t know I’m not a Yelper.
Michael: Uh, I don’t know. I don’t know.
(To the second In-N-Out employee) Thank you. I have one more question.
Employee: Yeah?
Michael: You have an employee back there whose name starts with an “x.” Do you know how to pronounce her name?
Employee: So-shi.
Michael: So-shi?
Todd: So-shi?
Employee: Yes.
Michael: So-shi. Thank you.
Todd: Okay. Thanks.
Katelyn Salem's Jeep
Todd: There we go.
Michael: So-shi. Interesting.
Todd: Yeah I would never have guessed that. It would have been completely off.
(Adding emphasis) So she was like...
(Michael laughs sarcastically.)
Todd: I’m just full of puns tonight, so punny.
Michael: Uhhhh…
Todd: Where you goin’ buds?
Michael: I don’t know... where I am.
Todd: Take—take—flip—flip around.
Michael: I need to go the other way.
Todd: Yes.
Michael: I think I just hit the wall. Like—
Todd: Uh oh. Right now?
Michael: Right now is like, “You need to go to sleep.”
Todd: Well, once you eat this burger...
Michael: So I’m gonna eat this burger and then I’m gonna close my eyeballs.
Todd: Oh. Yup, that wall? You just kind of, uh, pushed it my way and I just, uh, headbutted it.
(Michael laughs.)
Todd: For me, I just can’t just go into a... like, go and lay right down and go to sleep. I have to wind down before I get to that point. I’ll watch a little somethin’ or I’ll play a little game or somethin’.
Michael: For actually as long as I can remember, I’ve suffered from tinnitus.
Todd: The niiiiiiiing?
Michael: The sort of ringing in the ears.
Todd: Yeah.
Michael: Um, yeah, but within the—
Todd: I didn't know you had that!
Michael: Within the last couple of years it’s gotten a little bit worse. It’s no—It’s not a bad case of it at all. But if I’m in a totally quiet room, it is a little bit distracting.
Todd: So if—(laughs)—if i—in our, uh, new sound editing suite, if it was like a—like a quiet room, that would be death to you.
Michael: It wouldn’t be death, I would just be like, “Oh, I can hear that sound.”
Todd: I didn’t know—I didn’t know you had that. Is tha—Is that from just, uhhh... like, uh... something you did or is it just a natural thing?
Michael: I have no idea.
Todd: And it—it’s constant, huh?
Michael: Mhm. But because of that I find it easier to go to sleep if I turn on Netflix—
Todd: Yeah.
Michael: —and just have Futurama playing at kind of a low volume or—or something.
Todd: My—my, uh, friend’s boyfriend, he has to a—always had to have a TV on or something. Otherwise it’s—it’s pretty bad.
Michael: I can—I can fall asleep in a quiet room. There’s a little bit of distraction.
Todd: Well, you know, Michael, we learn things about each other new every day.
Michael: (Laughing) Mhm.
Todd: Someone’s like, “Hey, what’s—what’s one thing about Michael Aranda?” I’ll be like, “Well, did you know...”
(The car is parked in the La Quinta parking lot again and Michael and Todd begin to leave the car.)
Michael: Well, Todd... Thanks for the the good conversation.
Todd: It’s been a great conversation.
("Outro" plays over the end screen.)