Spit Drinker

Episode Information

Date of Video

July 15, 2016

Date of Upload

August 3, 2016

Duration

6 minutes, 19 seconds

Special Thanks

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Brought to you by

Judson Howie

Brittany George

Victor Yau

Yesterday’s comment of the day

“There’s a pretty stag-nant part in the middle of the vlog, Michael. You might want to spend a couple of bucks to sort that out.” by Drew Brown

Appearances by

Michael Aranda

Katelyn Salem

Todd Williams

Frank Aranda

Natasha Zabat

Kelsey Cote

Edited by

Michael Aranda - camera, editing, music

Jamie Mountain - editing

Transcript

(Inaudible)

Mechanism whirring

Indistinct clanging

Birds chirping

Michael Aranda: I still feel too cough-y and snotty to be around other... human beings.

I guess Katelyn doesn't count.

Michael clears throat

Katelyn Salem: I feel like I was sick enough this winter

Michael sniffs

Katelyn: that I've built up enough antibodies

for whatever the heck you have

Michael: (amused) Uh huh.

Katelyn: that it's probably not going to affect me.

Michael sniffs

Katelyn: 'Cause I don't feel sick whatsoever right now.

Michael: What I'm trying to say...

is that I didn't go to work today.

I'm going on a little walk.

Gonna try to catch some Pokémans

Katelyn: (Dejected) I wish there were more Pokéstops over here.

Michael: I might, uh... stop by the Chipotle.

There's something to be considered in—in the idea of me

coughing all over the food they have in there.

Maybe I shouldn't go...

but I want to.

Airplane flying overhead

Footsteps on pavement Car starting

Michael: Oh hey Toddly.

Todd Williams: Oh hey! How's it going?

Michael: Good.

Michael: Uh, can I do a burrito, please?

Chipotle Employee: Yeah, absolutely!

Michael: The sports authority here in Missoula is going out of business

so they're having, like, an 80% off sale

except it's a 80% sale... on... almost nothing now.

Todd, there's nothing in here.

Todd: Well, I'm hoping I can get some, uh, sweet, sweet new shoes after my bog incident.

Michael: Todd, these are the shoes for you!

I could get a zippered waist trimmer.

Todd: Do it!

Would that help us, you know, keep it

keep it nice and tight?

Michael: It will improve my appearance, Todd.

Todd: Keep it nice and tight?

Michael: It will also shed excess water.

Is that... code speak for it'll make you sweat?

Todd: I know...

Michael: Get a cup,

protect your important bits.

Todd: Keep it nice and tight!

Loud echoes of dogs barking

Michael: A couple local animal shelters

are having an adoption event, but, uh...

Dog barking continues, louder they picked probably the most

echo-y, desolate sounding building possible to do this in.

It's super echo-y in here.

Michael: Look at the puppies!

Cage rattles, dog barking continues

Todd: If you're not paying attention to him, he'll, like,

knock something over next to you and look at you.

He knows what he's doing.

Michael: So Knoxville's had a good time since he came home?

Todd: Aw yeah, he's a happy guy.

Katelyn: Hey kitty!

Todd: Yeah, he just... he burrows into everything.

Todd: Your shoulders, elbows. Knoxville purrs and brushes against phone

Michael: Hi.

Michael: We're about to have a Skype call

with my brother and his fiancée, who works at a boba shop,

about how to run a boba shop.

Natasha Zabat: Hi!

Michael: Hello!

Frank Aranda: Hello.

Todd: How—Howdy!

Michael: Welcome...

Michael: to this Skype call

Todd: I'm Todd, by the way!

Michael: That's Todd.

Natasha: I'm Natasha.

Michael: These are my World of Warcraft collectors editions.

Frank: You don't have the first one do you?

Michael: No, I'm really sad about it.

Frank: Yeah, they're like a thousand bucks.

Natasha: Thou—

Michael: Not even, they're like ten thousand dollars.

Frank: Okay, I was wrong.

So...

I don't know what you want, like,

Todd laughs

Frank: she's been working there for like 2 years

at the boba shop.

I mean, she's not really any sort of manager or anything,

but she... obviously just knows how the place runs

and all that so...

Michael: Well, that's more than I know.

I know literally nothing. Frank laughs

Todd: Nothing at all!

Michael: How do you run a boba shop?

Dance music

Todd: Well, that's all I have for right now.

Michael: Yeah, I think that was helpful.

Natasha: That's really exciting!

Michael: It's really scary...

Natasha laughs

Todd: Scary? Why?

Michael: Any venture is scary. There's—

Todd: It's—It's not—

Michael: There's a certain degree of

Michael: uncertainty involved.

Todd: Well, there— Of course there— Everything in life

Todd: ha— is uncertain, it's just a matter of, like, okay,

we're gonna try this and if it doesn't work, well then, it doesn't work.

Michael: Then we're gonna be broke.

Todd: Yeah, but you know what? At least you tried!

Michael: At least you tried...

Todd: It's, uhh, there's a lot of cool opportunities here and I'm excited.

I think it's gonna be something worth, uh, worth checking out.

So... I really appreciate you, uh, you chatting with us.

Natasha: Yeah, of course.

Michael: Yeah, and after you finish school

and after... Nathan... is... not in a band in Southern California anymore

then, uh, come up and (laughing) help us run the boba store!

Michael: I've been working on the changes for the vlog starting with season six

and one of the things that I got your guys' input on

was whether to put a new "special thanks" thing at the beginning of the video...

The main thing was not knowing if you guys felt like it was more valuable

to have your name at the end of the video versus the beginning of the video.

Because there are so many people on Patreon giving money now that

we have to split the tiers.

So the people who are giving a higher dollar amount are getting the more valuable space on screen

which will allow us to put more names on the screen for the lower tiers

so that we can get through everybody.

So, I've been working on this thing

and the programming going on behind the scenes here is that

there's this data input section and... if I shorten this to two names instead of three

it'll see that there are only two names in there and so it will center for two names

instead of for three names.

And then same thing again if I get rid of the second one so there's just one

it'll just center that one name.

Michael: I have a really important question.

If you took a bowl and you drooled into the bowl for like 15 minutes straight—

however long it takes to fill up the bowl—

it sounds super gross to then drink that bowl of saliva, right?

Katelyn: Yes.

Michael: But you drink your own saliva all day long.

Why is it gross when the saliva leaves your mouth

to then put it back in your mouth when it's in your mouth all day long,

you swallow it all day long,

and... it's fine?

Katelyn: I don't know but I don't want to do it! (laughing)

Michael: I just.. I was suddenly overcome by...

how gross the idea of drinking a bowl of my own spit would be.

Logically, my brain feels like I shouldn't feel grossed out by it.

Katelyn: Logic.

Purring and rubbing phone

Katelyn: The cat probably wouldn't be grossed out about it

Michael: Oh, hi cat.

I didn't know you were there. Laughs

Michael: Kelsey.

Kelsey Cote: Mhm.

Michael: I have a very important question for you.

Kelsey: Mhm.

Michael: Uh... do you think it would be gross....

if you...

drank a bowl of your own spit?

Kelsey: This was the question?

Michael: Yeah.

Kelsey: This was they question you got me so pumped up and excited for?

Michael: Yeah.

Kelsey: Pass.

Michael: Pa— You can't pass.

Kelsey: I can pass.

Michael: All day long, every day

Michael: You sit there and drink your own spit

Kelsey: Mhm, you swallow your own spit.

Michael: And it doesn't seem gross but, like, once—

Kelsey: But it never leaves your body

Michael: once it leaves your mouth

Kelsey: Yeah.

Michael: it's.. suddenly it's gross to put it back in.

Kelsey: It's foreign.

It's a foreign object at that point.

Michael: That's so weird.

Uplifting music