Nachos

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Episode Information[edit | edit source]

Date of video
January 1st, 2015
Date of upload
January 4th, 2015
Duration
9 minute 16 seconds
Edited by
Michael Aranda
Dan Molloy
Appearances by
Michael Aranda
Stefan Chin
Katelyn Salem
Jessica Angelo
Lem Chin
Brought to you by
Michael Morgan

Location[edit | edit source]

Anaheim, California
Target
In-N-Out Burger
Cocary Shabu Shabu

Weather[edit | edit source]

Sunny

High: 59°F/15°C

Low: 36°F/2°C

Humidity: 54%

Anthropometry[edit | edit source]

Weight: 179 lbs/81 kg

Body Fat: Unknown

Heart Rate: 76 bpm

Blood Pressure: 117/71 mmhg

Transcript[edit | edit source]

Inside House

(Stefan yawns, resembling a cow)

Michael: Huh?!

Stefan: Good morning. (Michael starts talking but is spoken over) You want the cua-shin-ee?

Michael: A what?

Stefan: A quiche.

Jessica: I didn't eat any of it.

Stefan: She didn't eat the cua-shin-ee.

Michael: The quiche?

Stefan: The quiche.

Michael: Who's coffee is this?

Jessica: Yours.

Michael: I don't drink coffee.

(Stefan's head slides in from behind Michael's and walks away)

Michael: Is this yours?

Stefan: No.

(Stefan's hand moves in frame and takes away the cup that was covering Michael's face)

Michael: Welcome to Twenty-Fifteen. It's like Twenty-Fourteen but a little bit different. Oh, I guess this is also a new season of WhatImDoingRightNow. Season 3! Are those hats that you made out of Reese's -

Jessica: How did you know??

Michael: Things? Have you tried wearing them?

Jessica: No, but Stefan put them on his nipples.

Stefan: Hey, nipple tassels.

(Stefan places 'hats' over his nipples)

Michael: Why is one so much pointier than the other?

Jessica: Its, the tree is really artistic.

Stefan: Its really in right now.


Outside, on the sidewalk

Michael: Start the new year with a jog.

(Car driving sounds, pan over a single, black sandal)

Michael: I just jogged up to Target and look who I found.

Jessica: Perfect timing.

Michael: Heyyyy.


Inside Target

Michael: You need travel shampoo?

Jessica: I use twice as much shampoo as I do conditioner.

Michael: You do have substantial hair.

Jessica: I do have hair. Look at that. Its all in one forty-nine, I'm gonna splurge.

Michael: Wow.

Jessica: My baby oil exploded in my bag and everything got covered in baby oil. It was a lot of baby oil.

Michael: Baby oil.

Jessica: Yeah. There should be like little Johnsons & Johnsons-

Michael: Baby oil. Baby oil. Baby oil.

Jessica: Oh right here! Travel sized, its perfect.

Michael: Wow!

Jessica: Teeny tiny.

Michael: Did you know that this locks in up to ten times the moisture?

Jessica: Did you know that this top locks in all of it so that it doesn't explode in my bag?

Michael: Ohhh.

Jessica: Mine was like a little like flippy top.

Michael: Oh yeah, those don't lock in the moisture.

Jessica: It didn't lock in anything.

Michael: Well, Christmas is over, so now its time for Valentine's Day. How do you feel about that consumerism Brian?

Brian: Um. For the most part, I'm heavily against it. But! It does mean that Reese's have their special edition uhhh peanut butter cups and everyone knows that the special editions have the best peanut butter to chocolate ratio.

Michael: I really-

Jessica: Cha-ching!

Michael: I don't like it when they put the middle nose thing in there.

Jessica: No, I don't think they know what they're doing.


Car park outside Target

Michael: Look at these rims! (pans over two white cars with turquoise rims) They must be friends.


Inside the Car

Michael: We was going to go to Chipotle but they're closed. Today's not a holiday though. But I guess they just want to treat their employees right.

Katelyn: (nodding head) Yeahhh

Michael: So we're going to go somewhere where they don't treat their employees right so we can eat food.


In-N-Out

Michael: In-N-Out doesn't treat their employees poorly, they actually treat them very well. They get paid well, they get good benefits. We shouldn't eat here. (Holds burger in frame) I got my burger with no bun. Carb free!

Unknown person: Except for the sauce.

Michael: Low carb! (Group laughs and Michael smiles)

(Sparrows hopping around on the ground, group can be heard talking in background)

Inside House

Michael: We're about to play some Zombicide! I go first! What's this scenario?

(Person heard explaining)

Michael: So we're starting there, there's an x there and an x there and there, or is there four?

Stefan: There's one in each building. Five.

Michael: Oh yeah. Okay, okay. We just have to collect the x's?

Stefan: Yep.

Michael: We don't have to get to an exit point or anything?

Stefan: Nope.

Jessica: It's harder than it seems.

Michael: So I'm orange. I've got three actions, s that how it works?

Stefan: Yeahhh.

Michael: I'm gonna move one. I'm gonna open the door. (Pwooo)

(Change in view of the board)

Michael: Look at all these zombies that were inside.

(Jessica talking in background)

Stefan: But you have at least three zombies.

Jessica: So I can get there, shoot and see if I get anyone than I can get out all the way over here if I want.

Michael: Yeah.

Stefan: That's true.

Jessica: But I'll also probably not role the right number. (whispering) Come on, come on, come on

Jessica: Ohhh!

Stefan: You got one.

Michael: You killed one.

(Focusing on zombies in the board)

Michael: Pwolurghhh (Knocks over one of the zombies)

Michael: (Holding zombie up to the lens) Is this the one with panties?

(Group talking in background)

Michael: Oooo, look at those panties.

Stefan: I'm gonna move three spaces down the street.

Michael: One, two, three.

Brian: Done.

Stefan: So this one, we can't kill

Jessica: He's safe.

Stefan: We need a Molotov.

Brian: I'm shootin' into the room!

(Slow-mo of dice falling)

Brian: I got him! And I leveled up to Tag

Michael: You're opening the Diner!

Stefan: Opening the Diner with die

Michael: Brian got a chainsaw!

(Stefan makes chainsaw sounds)

Jessica: What do you have to roll and how many do you get to roll?

Michael: Alright, we just cleared out this building. But the zombies are coming from that building. Zombies just came from sewer! Katelyn picked up the x! That's one out of four? Five?

Group: Five.

Michael: One out of Five.

(Change in viewpoint)

Michael: The abomination is approaching! Brian just picked up some glass bottles, Katelyn has some gasoline. So together we can make a Molotov cocktail that's gonna kill this big guy. (Focus on 'the big guy') Does he have panties?

(Suspenseful music and pan over the setup of the board)

Katelyn: Dead, arhhhh

Michael: Stefan killed it!

(Stefan makes evil sounding laugh)

Michael: We just got the third x, there's two more and a new abomination showed up

(Change in viewpoint)

Michael: Stefan died, Brian died, I've been cornered by all those zombies!

Jessica: What about this guy and these guys?

Michael: He, they moved towards, there.

Jessica: Here?

Michael: Yeah.

Stefan: But Jessica dies.

Brian: Jessica died.

Katelyn: Oh no.

Michael: I'm dead.

Stefan: Ahhhhhh!

Jessica: We tried so hard and we got so far but in the end, it doesn't even matter.

(Michael sings)

Stefan: Get the walkers to move back to this one.

Jessica: How??

Stefan: Katelyn's alive!

Michael: Pretty much every zombie possible in the game is on the board right now.

Stefan: There's one left.

(Zoom in on remaining zombie)

Katelyn: I just killed it.

Michael: One unspawned zombie.

(Focus on board)

Michael: You're escaping the zombies! (Zoom onto x) Katelyn's gotta get this thing here and then we win!

Stefan: Only got one shot to kill them.

Katelyn: I got them.

Stefan: But you killed them, okay.

Katelyn: And I made two noise.

Stefan: Yes, and then you can move into the building.

Katelyn: And then I can move here.

Michael: One square away!

Brian: And now she's in their line of sight! (points at mass of zombies behind her) They're all gonna go to the noise.

(Stefan moves the mass of zombies over one square)

Brian: We did it..! I hope..

Katelyn: Did I win? Did I win?

Stefan: I think so because is there any situation in which they would move that way?

Brian: No.

(Katelyn laughs)

Stefan: I think we did it.

Katelyn: I won!

Brian: We win!!

(Group cheers)

Brian: We did it!

Katelyn: That was almost not worth the time.

(It's Happening gif comes up screen)

Stefan: That was not worth the time.

Katelyn: Almost!

Stefan: We can go get dinner.


Inside Cocary Shabu Shabu

(Panning over bubble tea toppings and menu, Zoom in on lucky cat)

Michael: It is so crowded in here.


At a table in Cocary Shabu Shabu

Michael: Stefan.

Stefan: What?

Michael: Uhh, for the uninitiated, can you explain how the Cocary works?

Stefan: Cocary's got the pot and the grill at your table, you get the uh you go the refrigerator and get the plates, they charge you by the plate and then you cook it at your table, eat it and enjoy it, smile, love your family and then you pay the bill, go home, go to sleep, get mugged.


Inside a Car

Michael: I have no idea why I'm laughing but Brian started laughing and somehow (Sounds of Stefan, Michael and Brian laughing) I can't take it. Laughing continues Why are you laughing?!

Brian: I don't know! My abs hurt!

(Footage of everyone laughing)

Michael: Okay. So in the video description, you'll find a link to a video that you should watch. It's very worth your time.


Inside House

(Jessica heard laughing in the background)

Michael: Jessica is freaking out because she smells this phantom smell that she thinks smells like nachos. She sees no nachos so that is causing some kind of short circuit in her brain.

(Focus turns to Jessica who is still laughing)

Michael: She's literally crying about it right now.

Jessica: I just don't know where they are.

Michael: They, they don't exist.

Jessica: But what smells like nachos?

Michael: Nothing smells like nachos! There's no nacho smell. You literally have tears running down your face.

Stefan: She's crying.

Brian: Oh. Why's she laughing?

Michael: She smells nachos.

(Brian starts laughing)

Jessica: But they won't go away if everyone says there's no nachos.

Stefan: There's no nachos.

(Michael starts laughing)

Jessica: It smells, it smells just like it!

Brian: I can't!

Jessica: But like, doesn't this smell particularly like nacho cheese?