Business Venture

Episode Information

Date of video

May 21st, 2014

Date of upload

May 28th, 2014

Duration

9 minutes 1 second

Edited by

Michael Aranda

Appearances by

Michael Aranda

Katelyn Salem

Stefan Chin

Locations

Missoula, Montana

Michael Aranda's Apartment

Asahi

Stefan Chin's Ford Fiesta

Transcript

Michaels' Apartment

Michael Aranda: On today's episode of Tim Tam Flavor Fun Time, we're trying salted caramel. Again, these Tim Tams come to us from our friend Stephanie, from Australia.

Katelyn Salem: They smell, um, caramelly.

Michael: They do. Stefan, do you want to try one?

Stefan Chin: Ooooooook.

(Everyone takes a bite and chews for a moment)

Stefan: Oh, tastes like caramel. And a little bit of salt.

Katelyn: Mmhmm.

Stefan: That's not bad.

Katelyn: Um, I think these are my second favorite so far. My first favorite were...

Michael: The raspberry ones?

Katelyn: The raspberry ones.

Michael: Mmmhmm. Yeah, these are alright. Well, maybe we should try one more flavor of Tim Tams.

Katelyn: Ok.

Michael: Turkish Delight. You're crumbling all over me.

Katelyn: (with mouth full of cookie) Oh my god, I'm so sorry, let me just wipe that off for you. I don't like it.

Michael: What the heck kinda flavor is this? I can't figure out what this is. It's ok. I guess?

Asahi

Michael: A-sa-hi! a-Sa-hi? A-sa-hi? a-sa-Hi? How to pronounce? (looking at menu) Japanese and Chinese. Katelyn, do you know what the opposite of oriental is?

Katelyn: Continental?

(Michael shakes head no)

Stefan: Good answer. (Katelyn makes a giant grinning face)

Katelyn: What is it? Is there an answer? There's not even an answer to that question. Is there? What is it?

Michael: Yeah, there is.

Stefan: Occidental.

Michael: Occidental. Oriental. Occidental. Eastern. Western.

(Michael uses chopsticks to become a walrus)

Katelyn: (Reading the "hard in the paint" Urban Dictionary description) To approach a problem, obstacle, or challenge with supreme confidence of success through a commitment to use all facilities available to one's self to achieve a goal.

(Michael loses a "walrus" tooth)

Michael: (with both "walrus" teeth in place) The service here is not the fastest.

(A cut occurs to the waiter bringing food)

Michael: Oh, is this food?

Stefan: Ohh!

Michael: Thank you.

Katelyn: Thank you.

(Michael takes a bit of his sushi)

Asahi Parking Lot

Michael: What Stefan and I just learned as we were sitting in that suhi, su, sushi, testing one two three, sushi establishment was that we are old men. Because...

Stefan's Ford Fiesta

Michael: Behind us, there were two teenage girls who were talking faster (Michael drops camera) OooOoo. I dropped you. Who were talking faster than we could understand.

Stefan: I mean, I could understand, but jeez, they just tired me out.

Michael: Huh!

Katelyn: This hair has been in here a while.

Michael: What?

Stefan: Ooo.

Katelyn: Because your blonde, the end piece right there, is the black.

Michael: Oh yeah, the blonde goes pretty far down. Where'd you find that hair?

Katelyn: On this chair, on this seat.

Michael: Oh.

Stefan: You a detective?

Michael: Sorry for shedding in your car months ago.

(Katelyn and Stefan chuckle)

Outside

Michael: Jog, jog, jog, jog, jog, jog, jog. It's kinda pretty over there. Where the sun's being all "setty". Mooo, cow. Moo cow.

Katelyn: Cow!

Michael: They don't care. They don't want to talk to me.

Michael's Apartment Parking Lot

Michael: Just finished 6 miles. I burned 860 something calories. (Katelyn punches her arms up in the air, successfully) You probably burned less than that because you weight 70 pounds less than I do.

Katelyn: Awww.

Michael: Aww.

Katelyn: That's just not fair.

Michael: But, you weigh less.

Katelyn: But I ran as far as you.

Michael: It takes less energy for you to run the same distance.

Katelyn: But, but, my proportions are smaller than yours, so my legs have to move faster.

Michael: But it still takes less energy to move a smaller amount of mass.

Katelyn: Yeah ok.

Michael's Apartment

Michael: I got an email today. And I usually get one or two of these kinds of emails a month. And I'm going to read it to you, because why not. The title of this is "Business Venture/Proposal". Michael, congrats on your enormous internet success. Your videos are great and your 241,000 subscribers are a testament to your creativity and originality. I am the CEO of a start-up in New York that is perfect for your channel. Our site gives creators an opportunity to achieve financial independence. I am certain you make a good living off your YouTube profit shares and sponsor, but my site offers something a little different. We provide an additional way to generate significant income. Now that you have established yourself as a significant YouTube personality, I want to discuss with you how my company can turn those 241,000 followers into really significant wealth. I'd like to explain, in detail, what we're about, as I'm confident our model would work for you on just one of your videos. I really feel we're on to something. We're getting great reception from artists, musicians, filmmakers and YouTubers that take the time to listen to what we're about and have to offer. I've attached an analysis of your channel, so you can see just how much additional income just one video can generate on our site. Call me at blah blah blah blah blah. I really hope to hear from you soon. Sincerely, Rich Golio. (in a deeper, commercial style voice) The information contained in this message may be privileged and confidential. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hear by notified that any review, printing, dissemination, distribution, copying, or any other use of this communication is strictly prohibited. If you have received this communication in error, please reply to the sender and delete all copies of the message.

I really liked the part where he said he was going to explain in detail what they're about. And then he didn't explain it at all. So to this email they attached (does air quotes) an analysis of my channel, which I'm sure is just some automatically generated thing by a bot, um, that lists how many videos I have, how many average views I get per video, and all that. And there thing, for some reason, estimated that I usually generated $494 per video that I upload. Which is hilarious. I make, like, $10 per video, if I'm lucky. If I made $500 doing nothing but my own channel full time would be really easy. This thing goes on to mention that, given whatever math they have done here, they think that if I put one of my videos on their service, it would generate $6,036 per video. What? I don't get it. I don't like these emails. I don't like these services. I don't understand where that value comes from. I don't know whose money that is. I just, it just doesn't make any sense.

So, after reviewing the actual website of this company, it seems to be a place where content creators make videos and then, rather than uploading them for free, they put them up for people to buy. So I'd be like "Hey Arandavision viewers. If you wanna watch this video, you can buy it for a dollar or something". They have a frequently asked questions section on their website. And one of the questions is "How do I sell my videos?". The answer is "Register as a contributor. Upload them to the site and market, market, market. Get the link out there. Don't be shy. If it's a quality video, something people will want to see, people will buy!". Basically, this company's business model is like you go and make your own content, you go and sell your own content, and we'll take a cut of it.

Katelyn just pointed out that people have no way of knowing if the content is good before they buy it. So, what reason do they have to buy it? Do I have to start making trailers for each one of my videos? I'm going to reply to this guy. Hello Rich. I am interested in learning more about your service. Specifically, how are the prices set per video and what is your company's cut of the profit? Hope to hear back from you soon.

(Michael is standing in the darkness, listening to his neighbors having an argument)

Michael: I couldn't tell if that was the people one floor beneath us or two floors beneath us. But, the woman is not happy at how fast her male companion went through some pack of cigarettes. And is swearing that her money is no longer going to support his cigarette habit. You go girl!